I thought I would share a punch in the gut I got from a good freind of mine. We where talking about living our lives for Christ and how painful it is when you get an oppurtunity to preach the gospel (as instructed...) But an internal battle wages and you shy away from the moment. In those moments I feel defeated. I didn't have enough courage or I was afraid of what people might think. I didn't push the importance of certain issues because I felt people would be put off. I feared if I agressively stood for Christ, They would turn away and I would lose a close relationship or at the very least damage it. For those of you who know me (or think you do)I struggle with this constantly. Having a deep conviction about the destiny of those that I love and yet acting incredibly weak and cowardly. I often shamefully approach my savior in prayer, knowing full well that I let numerous oppurtunities slip by as I stand blessed over and over again. This has been for years my thorn, Unable to tell those that I would die for about the one that died for me. Talking to strangers is easy, So why is it so difficult to share with people that I love and trust? My freind shared many of the same struggles and in the end we both agreed that in part, it had to do with the fact that we felt unworthy. Drowning people telling others how to swim...It's an amazing gut check when you consider what Christ endured unjustly because he loved you. Not humanity, or your kind, or your religon, but you. We parted company, both of us reflective of the conversation and for myself thankful that God has provided freinds that are willing to be honest about their struggles. Not too long after I got a text from him... Mark 8:38 Gut Check time
If you have some time, read the passage. I would love to hear if it affected you as it did me.
In my prayers always,
Matt
3 comments:
I guess I'm the only one reading this because it hit me too. Oh sure, I like to think that when I don't step up to the plate it is because I am being sensitive to those who are not in the same place. That's a way to let myself off the hook. Will have to be more aware and verbal about who my Savior is!!!! Love you, Mom
Matt,
Your comments today really hit home with me as well. It is really easy to be a Christian & walk the walk with our friends and those who love us but it is quite another thing to be a Christian when it isn't always easy. Karen V.
It still hits me! This is such a great passage! My prayer this week has been:
Give me confidence to risk sharing the gospel, Lord, since You've promised to show up when I do.
AP
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