The core

Several years ago my grandmother died...Her death did more than bring grief, It splintered a family structure and left it in ashes. The family that she left was sent into a tailspin. I often had conversations with my brother about how she was the hub of an intricate wheel in which the spokes all spun around. She was that in life...and in death the family was stuck with the dilemna of what to do with the seperated pieces. Of course at first, subconciously, we looked to see who would fill her spot. This was ridiculous and an exercise in futility in that no one could, and I think we all learned, no one should. Death wasn't foreign to us, we had lost grampy several years earlier. But we had Gram and Grandma to shine for us as keepers of the faith. It wasn't easy for them, but they showed us how to except death and then...live! I see so much of my grandmother in my aunts and my uncles she... left such an imprint. I remember that any moment she would shut her eyes raise her hands and say "praise you Lord Jesus."

In light of this wonderful woman, is it any wonder that the core was formed. Look at the examples: Pa, Grandma, Grammy, Grampy, Auntie Russi and Uncle Michael, Aunt Noel and Uncle Randy, Uncle Peto and Auntie Fray. Fellow members of the core, these are our heros. Is their any question that at any time you could approach anyone of these people for help and they would walk to the corners of the globe to make sure you were safe. The core is an extension of them, you all are an extension of them and I feel very proud and humbled to be counted among you. This family, like every family, has never been perfect, and yet not only have we survived, we have thrived under a blanket of acceptance and love that I have rarely seen woven by strong faithful people that have held family up as second only to God.

To the core I echo this sentiment so eloquently laid out by Unc, we need not look to try to stay engaged in eachothers life because we already are. We don't need to ramp up efforts because in my world the love I have for you is effortless and easy. I am so proud of all of you and you should know that I often talk of you not as cousins but as brothers and sisters. When we are in town we want to see Maddi pitch and we are so interested in what is happenning in Davis and Mexico. Weddings, babies, furure engagements?, are all tops on our list of joyful news and exciting happennings. I love you guys and pray for you not only for strength and peace and guidance in your own lives, but thankfulness for the blessing that you are to ours.

We love you very much

Its not about what I want...

I have to admit...I want to be rich, driving the fancy cars and never having to look at my finances or struggle through bills. That would certainly help wouldnt you think. Money can't buy happiness but it's a hell of a down payment isn't it. Dedicating your life to what god wants for you doesn't strip away the desire for things that are worldly. I would even submit that those struggles that you have had in your life before accepting Christ Jesus actually intensify after the power of the holy spirit begans to guide you because you are now aware of those areas of your life that used to be sinful and displeasing to God. Along with salvation and peace comes discernment and responsibility. And one of the hardest things to do is to let go, and trust God with your entire life. Literally to let the spirit saturate your existence and allowing yourself to be an instrument of him in every situation. But thats great for the priests and pastors, what about me? What does that mean for me? Can I still have my Ferrari God? (What a good name for a book). It begs the question...can I be just a little bit in control or do I have to submit entirely to the will of God? What if God wants me poor? (oh the horror) I am always inspired by people like John Michael Portier who travels the country with his family in an RV worshiping God in every venue living off the donations from those he worships with. Thats a warrior for Christ. What If God appeared to me and said "Matt I want you to sell all your stuff and donate it to the poor and start traveling the country and using the gifts I gave you to bring the gospel to people who need it...my sheep need to be fed" Did anyone ever hear Bill Cosby do that bit about building the Ark?

"Noah, this is God, I want you to build me an Ark"
Noah: Right...Whats an Ark?
"It will be 40 cubits by 40 cubits"
Noah: Right...Whats a cubit?

The point is how many of us after release from the insane asylum would do what Noah did. How many of us can answer the call that God has for us. The ultimate designer has charted the perfect course. Life could be no more fufilling than to succeed in the only life plan worth striving to accomplish...God's. The problem is that God doesn't think much of my wordly desires, my materialistic way of thinking. I may want a Ferrari and it is not outside of God's merciful bounty that one day I might be screaming Ciao as I drive by at Mach 6. But is it in God's will? There are those that say God wants me to have that Ferrari. That we are sons and daugters of a gracious and giving God that will bless those that love him. Essentially for faithful servants of Christ we can have the best of both heaven and earth because we have God on our side. I don't discount this way of thinking. But we should be careful about how this is applied to our lives.

"If anyone teaches false doctrines and does not agree to the sound instruction of our lord Jesus Christ and to godly teaching, he is concieted and understands nothing. He has an unhealthy interest in controversies and quarrels about words that result in envy, strife, malicious talk, evil suspicions and constant friction between men of corrupt mind, who have been robbed of the truth and who think that godliness is a means to financial gain." 1 Timothy 6: 3-5 (NIV)

Paint it any way you like, being rich isn't on Gods radar, at least not in the worldly sense. (Matthew 6: 19-20) Jesus talks about worldly posessions and their importance in relation to storing up heavenly treasures. This verse is often used by pastors as a proof text for donations (tithing, etc...) and I believe it makes a valid argument for earthly investment in godly endevours. This is important in the life of a trusting believer. But the reward of salvation can't be bought and if it could, we couldn't afford it anyway. How much is Christ's ( son of God) life worth? We invest in Gods work because we trust that are NEEDS will be met by a loving God. No matter how much I invest...I could never payoff the debt owed. And so I may not feel the plush leather of an F-40 sink underneath me as I stab the accelerator. And I would still be in the red when it comes to Gods ledger.

Christians, money isn't the problem and those with it aren't evil. I have to ask myself as I open the pages of motor trend magazine if the Ferrari gets in the way of God. Do I worship things more than I worship him. Do I spend more time on financial planning or spiritual growth. The undivided attention of the beliver to godly diligence allows us to make decisions that are in line with what God wants for us. I find it frustrating to speak to people that are disenchanted with God because they made poor decisions outside of Gods counsel, let alone conventional wisdom. I find it even more frustrating when people twist irresponsible actions and decisions into some righteous display of trust in which Gods will is ambiguously morphed into the wants and desires of the sinner rather than the other way around. Sadly this way of thinking has infiltrated Christianity causing a paradigm shift in the believer's understanding of the greatness, and awesomeness, of an almighty, sovereign God. God has become a yes man to the wants and desires of those that believe in his son rather than the sinner being a yes man to God for the awesome display of imeasurable suffering to pay off an entirely lopsided debt. In short, although God can and will bless us throughout our lives because he is good and merciful, He owes us nothing. And there is no faith formula or prayer that can move the hand of almighty God less he chooses so.

My counsel will stand and I will do MY pleasure (Isaiah 46:10)
Whatsoever the Lord pleased, that did he in heaven, and in earth, in the seas, and all deep places. (Psalm 135:6)

It's not about what I want...it's about submitting my life to what he wants and living the full life he has layed out for me from before I was created.

Can you phathom the mysteries of God? Can you probe the limits of the almighty? They are higher than the heavens...What can you do? They are deeper than the depths of the grave...What can you know? (Job 11: 7-8)

What this means to me is that my desire must first be to align myself with god's plan and persue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness (1 Timothy 6:13) If in Gods sovereignty through my labors and sound financial wisdom based on godly principles I get to a point that I can afford my Ferrari than hop in and lets enjoy the ride together. Until then I will hold to the understanding that it is God's will that I seek him, everything else is secondary.

Putting this into daily practice is far more challenging. We live in a soceity where status is based on what we have not what we give. And so the battle to keep just a little piece of the uppity need for nice clothes and nice cars is really a sin of omission. We havn't given ourselves entirely to God. And perhaps it gives me pause to know that throwing myself into the arms of God might not work out the way I want it to and my Ferrari is merely a dream. Wordly thinking and sad if you look at it from Christ's perspective. I gave up my life and you don't know if you can give up your desire for a nice car? Makes me wonder why God bothers with us pea brains at all I mean how selfish can ones thinking be. This is why I feel the name it and claim it philosophy of so many churches is the ultimate form of arrogance or perhaps ignorance. Do you honestly believe that in addition to submitting his life for you, Christ is now obligated to serve your needs because you have announced yourselves as annointed. What Bible are you reading!? Gives credence to the words of Christ when in the last days there will be many who will say "but Lord, we performed miracles and drove out demons in your name" and Jesus responds" Away from me you evildoers, I never knew you."

HALLOWEEN

A DAY AT THE BEACH

Elections

Those who know me or read this blog know that I was dissappointed in the election results. I don't need to hash out my reasons...but in watching the post election coverage I was frustrated to hear a Mcain supporter say that he was going to treat Obama the same way that Democrats treated Bush over the last eight years, he even summed it up with "two can play that game"

Folks, agree or disagree, Barack Obama is the next President of the United States. And that office and the man deserve the respect and support of ALL Americans. The divisive politics that have split this nation are rooted in an attitude of seek and destroy between political divides. Obama faces extremely hard challenges whatever your political persuasion. Let us not dwell upon a political defeat but on a political oppurtunity. Perhaps new blood is exactly what the doctor ordered. The flip side of the same coin is a call to not support blindly. Let us judge this new presidents performance not with the stained rhetoric of hate we've heard for eight years but an honest evaluation of his performance as Commander and Chief. I freely admit that Barack is charismatic and likeable. Let us join together in prayer and support for our new President with respect and restraint as it relates to him and the office he holds.

I believe in Democracy and we are living history with an Obama Presidency. The election has taken place ,the votes have been cast and counted and here we are. The voice of the people has been heard. This cuts both ways such as in proposition 8. The electorate voted twice on this issue. Twice they agreed that they don't want gay marriage. Disagree? OK in 4 years introduce new legislation and spend your time between now and then convincing people you are right. If you win...you win, but if you lose, litigation is not the answer. Abortion, Gay marriage, prayer in schools are social issues that should be decided by the electorate, not the courts. Debated vigorously in the arena of ideas and then put to the people to decide. Don't like the outcome? Move to a state that agrees with you. It's that simple. I disagree with gay marriage and voted against it...If you are mad about that ask yourself, How many of those in the majority that voted for prop 8 could care less about the issue but voted that way because they have a fundamental conviction that the courts overstepped their bounds in overturning the will of the voters the first time? Weather you like it or not (Mr. Newsome), Presidents, social issues, bond maeasures of all kinds are voted on by the people as it relates to the public forum. The will of the majority gets subverted throught the legal process and we go round and round on issues that quite frankly will never be conceded by either side. Use reason and understanding to persuade the electorate then...RESPECT the vote!

Ok Two significant events today. Today Is Wendy's Birthday. And today is election day. I urge anyone that reads this blog to go out and vote today. Doesn't matter if you are voting for Barack or John, the right to vote for our elected officials has been won b the blood and sacrafice of many that came before us. We don't have to look to far to see real veterans right in our family. After you vote pick up the phone and call Wendy 559-816-1057.

Love you all
Flipper

Several years ago I was at a family reunion in Pittsburgh when one of my rather robust distant relatives tripped and fell. She landed with a pretty good thud and I remember that my first instinct was to laugh...okay I'm a terrible person but I think it's funny when people fall down. I remember my brother slipping and falling in front of the entrance at a ski resort...hang on...just the thought of it causes me to pause and laugh out loud. At any rate the lady ate it pretty good and she wasn't in the best of health to begin with. There was real concern among those of us that were not trying to hold back the giggles, that she could really be injured. I was not a firefighter at the time...I wouldn't become a firefighter for three more years but I remember that day. Of all the people at that party, my brother stepped forward in order to take care of the patient. I would learn later that the questions he was asking were standard EMT stuff but at the time, I thought my brother was a hero. He was calm and collected. He was doing an initial assessment but he sounded like Dr. San Filippo and I watched in utter amazement. Up until that point I thought being a firefighter was pretty...well...easy. "Put the wet stuff on the red stuff" as we like to say. I really had never thought about what my brother had been learning all those years working for CDF and attending classes. I really didn't appreciate the kind of mentality that he had developed that would allow him to remain calm in chaotic situations. (We're Italian so a meatball falling off the table is paramount to Armageddon, imagine what a falling relative is like). It wasn't the first time I looked up to my brother because quite Frankly I always looked up to my brother. In High School I played the sports my brother played. When I was little I used to sneak into my brothers room at night and sleep with him in his bed. But as I got older, I guess I tried to be unlike my brother...you know...forge my own identity. But after several years of forging (if that's a word) I came right back to that family reunion with my brother engaged in a crisis situation, calm, cool, and collected. I was right back to the point I left, 10 years before, I wanted to be like him. And three years later I became a Firefighter/Engineer for the Kings County Fire Department. Funny thing is, last night, I realized that maybe in some respects I will never be like I perceived my brother to be so many years ago. With the mentoring of my Captain and friend, I have developed into a confident Firefighter. There isn't much that gets me riled these days. Multi-casualty traffic accidents, fully involved structure fires, medical aids for broken limbs, stabbings, pulse less non-breathing, hazardous material spills, you name it, I've probably encountered it in some form or another. And this wealth of experience has only expanded my knowledge of the right and wrong directions to take early on an incident. I still have a lifetimes worth of lessons and experience that I haven't lived...but what feels good is that I am well on my way and at times, after the lights and sirens are off, I realize that I have become a little of what I saw in my brother that day at the reunion. However, last night, I was reminded of something that looms out there every time the bell rings. It's the improbable, the rare, and for me the dreaded..."Station 12 medical Aid for 4 year old not breathing..." I don't know how it affects the professionals around me or my brother, but dealing with children in trauma/life threatening situations is emotionally exhausting. The very first EMT call I ever ran was a 6 month old infant that aspirated on her own vomit. I walked in and the deputy police officer handed me the limp warm body of a baby just like my Grayson at the time. I performed flawlessly establishing an airway and performing CPR, I did everything right and yet I was crushed...I got home grabbed my children and weeped, I couldn't hold them tight enough. I learned two things that day, first that I can do this job, and second... I might never be like my brother. When the call came out last night, without anything ever being said, there was an extra sense of urgency. We both knew what was at stake and the clock is your enemy when someone is not getting oxygen. Although I acted in the same professional manner I had five years earlier, that same emotional pit clung to the insides of my stomach and I could feel a tidal wave of emotion as I watched the ambulance drive away. I remember talking to my brother-in-law Chris about this and he advised that I would have to find the strength somewhere to just forget about it. It made sense at the time, learning to understand I was not at fault for what happened, I was only there to help. But all these years later and I haven't been able to do that, and quite frankly I'm not sure I want to. I think my brother in law is probably one of the best persons I know, but I disagree with what he said only in this respect. I'm not sure I ever want to be the kind of person that sees a suffering child and isn't emotionally affected. And so I have come to the realization that maybe I will just have to ride this emotional roller coaster in the rare event that I deal with young children. Perhaps God wired me this way so that I would and do take this job to heart. Maybe that's why I love what I do. I have an emotional stake in every thing that happens after the alarm goes off. For whatever the reason it appears I won't be able to shake the connection I have with this type of emergency. And so in a way I have become just like my brother except I am wearing my own shoes...I guess that's close enough.

32 salvation option on 2...break

The other day I was watching a news story about a young gay man that was being harassed by a church organization. I won't repeat the words that where used but I will tell you that it made me angry. Mostly because on every overtly anti-homosexual sign was a sign of the cross. I began to think about that sign and I realized that I don't think Jesus would have reacted in the same way. Don't get me wrong I don't advocate homosexuality. I believe it's a sin. But does anyone remember the story of the woman that was caught with another man...the local people brought her to Jesus as sort of a trick. They knew the punishment for such a crime was stoning so they brought her before Christ and asked him to lay judgement upon her for the sins she committed. Jesus began to write something in the sand at his feet and his answer was simple, "If anyone of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her" (John 8:7) If there was anyone who had the right to cast judgement upon the woman it was Jesus. "I pass judgement on no one. But if I do judge my decisions are right, because I am not alone. I stand with the father who sent me. (John 8:16). Amazingly in the life of Jesus we recognize the awesome mercy of God. Later in the chapter Christ says " Has no one condemned you...than neither do I condemn you...Go now and leave your life of sin." In a nutshell this should be exactly how a christian (one who follows in the footsteps of Christ) should respond to sin. In no way should we accept sin but Christ gives us a very clear blueprint in this one incident of exactly what a christian does when encountering sin. First, recognize that the sin you may recognize in someone else is no worse than the sin in your own life. There are not varying degrees of sinners, and according to Matthew in chapter 7, we will be judged to the degree that we are judgemental. Furthermore we should concentrate on eradicating sin from our own lives before looking to fix anyone else. I might add that in Romans 3:10-23, that we are instructed that not one of us meets the heavenly standards required for salvation. Essentially, none of us carry the credentials of Christ to pass judgement upon another.
Secondly, we need to first forgive recognizing ones struggle with sin. Jesus does this when he says "than neither do I condemn you." We must approach sin as sinners. Holding are brothers and sisters in Christ accountable is not the same as sin judgement upon uncommitted souls. I do not expect one who has not accepted Christs salvation to understand a judgemental attack without personal involvement. The hecklers standing in line felt justified to stand up for scripture and against sin. I too feel it necessary to stand up for scripture emphatically, but as Jesus teaches us, it is more important to lift up the sinner. Someone very smart told me one time that no one has ever been argued into the kingdom of heaven. Do you think that the homosexual man was prompted to look at the message of Christ and the sin in his life because of the attacks of the crowd? The last part of the message is as telling as the first two and leads me to my final point. By telling the woman to "leave her life of sin", Christ emphasizes the importance of a sinless life. With love and forgiveness, Christ instructs her not to sin. At no point does he make light of her sin pointing out the importance of change, but he does this not from a position of judgement (as was his right) but from the depths of love and mercy. I have often thought about what Jesus wrote in the sand that day. But I don't question what he has written in my heart. As Christians we are to hate sin because it stands in the way of our relationship with Christ, but Christ has given us an escape from the sin in our life and he even offers it to sinners like me. I remind myself of this whenever I feel the sin of self righteousness brewing. As I said before I don't think uncommitted sinners are argued into heaven...perhaps we should take a look at Christs playbook.